Report From Hero HQ West

After a several mile hike in the snow, I arrived at Tenspeed Hero Headquarters West. Besides the rustic conditions and unseasonable snow (some might say unreasonable snow), the most obvious feature is the unfortunate rarity of interns. I was not expecting a hero’s welcome, scratch that, I was expecting a hero’s welcome. After digging for the shovel, then digging for the door latch, then searching for the hidden key, I entered the cabin and was greeted by stale air and mouse droppings. “Hello air so stale and droppings so small,” I announced to no one but the air and droppings. I spent the next few minutes graciously accepting the generosity of my nonexistent intern: “Why yes Stephen, a cup of tea would be lovely,” and “Thank you so much for digging the propane tanks out for me. What? You fixed the broken gas line? Add an extra day to your timecard, on me.” Then I dug out the propane (so I could have gas to fix my tea), discovered the broken gas line, eliminated the mouse droppings – welcoming as they were, and built a fire to heat the tea water. A few short hours later I sat in front of the fire happily sipping lukewarm tea and reading Autobiography of a Yogi by Paramhansa Yogananda.