Andre Greipel Wins Stage thirteen of the 2012 TDF

Saint-Paul-Trois-Châteaux to Le Cap d’Agde (217 kilometer)

Good God Mr. Greipel!

Where do we start? How do we absorb this Tour de France? Yes Greipel wins his third stage and we ask ourselves around the table if this means anything. Does this herald a new era or the middling end of another? We seek a native guide to look at the broken twigs and bent blades of grass, so they can guide our way. Since it is the Tour de France maybe we should be reading the bent antennas atop the RV’s and the painted and smudged names of today’s riders upon the steep and narrow roads.

What we know of this tour is that Alberto is not there. We know that Andy broke something and he is not there. We know that Mark Cavendish signed onto a team where his ambitions will for the foreseeable future be second to the General Classification. We know that people are casting doubts on Wiggo. We know that Wiggo is saying words our Mothers, Sisters and Aunts despise and to be frank my Grandmother does not know exists. We know one Director Sportif’s could not come to France for allegedly building empires on suspect blood and tiny pills. We know that Sagan climbs almost as good as he sprints. We know that Tyler Farrar seems like the loneliest man on the planet. We know that if this post was written on time we would not be thinking about Tacks and French Riders attacking at the wrong moments.

And by the way, we also know that Phillippe Gilbert is slower this year and Thor, who is also not at the TDF, has something growing inside of him that does not allow him to go fast. These things we know. However, we do not know whether Sagan is better than Greipel or if Froome’s is capable of committing the greatest coup d’état since Hinault & Lemond. Lets hope for great things!

And lest we forget, we celebrate another illustration from the talented Rebecca Goesling (@thefutureisok-follow her!). The man is transformed. The Gorilla pounds his chest. Lots of gold for lots of bannanas. If he wins a fourth stage he will be able to fill a container ship with his tossed peels.